My alopecia journey started 12 months ago, in the summer of 2023. Two big patches seemed to appear overnight, just six weeks before my wedding. By December, I’d lost every hair on my head. By January, every hair on my body.

The speed of going from alopecia areata, to alopecia totalis, to alopecia universalis was shocking. The fear and trauma over that period were quite indescribable. Feelings of grief at literally losing myself, along with my hair. Losing my personal identity, my confidence and everything that goes with it. Then there was the anxiety, worrying every day if it would get worse, being scared to leave the house in case people noticed, or commented or stared. Feeling isolated, feeling like no one understands, feeling scared.

My hair loss was all I could think about, and this resulted in me taking a month off sick just before I braved the shave as I wasn’t sleeping and I couldn’t think straight. I know that many will relate to the tangle of negative emotions that alopecia brings.

But there was a turning point for me in handling those emotions and that was being introduced to the practice of gratitude. At first it seemed like a cliche, ‘Be grateful for what you have’ and I didn’t think it would help, but I decided to give it a go anyway. Now I understand that it's not possible to think negative thoughts at the same time as thinking positive thoughts! This calm time in your brain helps to lower the cortisol levels in your body and brings a feeling of wellbeing.

To begin with I started to list 10 gratitudes per day. This was everything from my supportive husband, my healthy & happy children, the roof over my head, etc. but where possible I tried to get really specific about things that had happened that day.

The next step for me which really helped to build my resilience and feelings of self-confidence back up was starting to turn the gratitudes into a positive affirmation (which basically means positive self- talk).

For example:

"I am grateful to have had a great review meeting at work today. I work hard and deserved the positive feedback."

Or

"I am grateful for a lovely afternoon in the park with the kids. I’m a good mum and I gave the kids 100% of my attention."

Shifting the focus from what I had lost to everything I had and everything I liked about myself was liberating and genuinely helped me to accept the card I’ve been dealt and to grow as a person through the adversity.

I personally practice gratitude at night as it helps to quieten the anxious thoughts which allows me to sleep. Others practice gratitude in a morning so they start their day on a high. You could do both! I list my gratitudes in the notes section of my phone, whilst other people prefer to write in a journal. There really is no right and wrong to this, it’s whatever helps you! If 10 is too difficult, think of 5 things you’re grateful for. As you develop the practice it will get easier.

This practice didn’t erase the pain of my hair loss, but it made it more bearable. It gave me a sense of control over my emotions. Instead of spiralling into despair, I found reasons to smile, even on the toughest days. Now, 12 months on from those first patches, I’ve accepted my diagnosis and most days are ‘good days’ which is all you can wish for in the beginning!

If anyone would like to chat to me more about practicing gratitude and affirmations then please do follow me on Instagram at Baldie_Rocks. It’s my space where I try to share some positivity and show that we can truly handle anything that comes our way!